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The Weasel: State of the Union Address

Posted by The_Weasel on February 01, 2006 - 9:53 AM

Text of President George W. Bush’s State of the Union Address

PRESIDENT BUSH: Tonight this union is strong. And with your help, we will make it stronger.

APPLAUSE

The state is going great. Unemployment is good, homeownership of people with homes is up, and we are winning the war in Iraq.

LAUGHTER

Excuse me folks -- as I was saying -- the state is good, but we can do better. For example, we need to break America‘s addiction to oil.

I know a thing or two about addiction. So I know our nation can overcome this national problem.

We’ll call it -- the “War on Oil.”

WILD APPLAUSE

I propose we use more electricity as an alternative to high-priced oil. Everyone has it in their home already. Just plug things in instead of burning expensive foreign oil. It’s clean, quiet and its available all over the world.

SILENCE

I propose we use more batteries to reduce our nation’s growing demand for energy. Think of all the things you can run on batteries -- flashlights, radios, watches -- everything but cars.

We need gas-guzzling vehicles to keep our domestic oil production going.

The only way to solve this oil problem is to throw money at it. Lots of it. In fact it’s going to be very expensive. It might even be costly.

I propose we give a $600 billion no bid contract to Halliburton for, well, I’m not really sure, but Dick Cheney says it’s a good idea… and that’s good enough for me.

Thank you and may God bless America.

APPLAUSE, CROWD STANDS AND DOES THE WAVE

- Pop goes The Weasel

Submitted by mcwash on February 01, 2006 - 10:59 AM.

And just think they say more than fifty percent of our voters voted for him, WHY? oh why I cry


Submitted by sqadupndaatl on February 02, 2006 - 1:04 AM.

man ill be so glad when this guy is out of office, i mean the country is at a all time worst, there are no jobs, gas is at a all time high, and i dont see no end to all this madness


Submitted by mydtwc on February 02, 2006 - 9:10 AM.

I just don't know where you Bush Bashers are coming from???

We have a Compassionate conservative in the white house that has the whole countries best interest at heart but especially the poor and downtrodden.

He has returned ethics and morals to the white house.

He has saved us from saddam Hussein that apparently MUST HAVE had something to do with 9/11. I still am not real clear on that one.

At first I thought it was supposed to be weapons of mass destruction but then somehow 9/11 came in and then liberating the Iraqi people and then creating a democratic Muslim state but whatever the reason with Donald Rumsfeld's expertise, he has been able to do it with only 2,250 or so American lives lost and that has to be cheap by anybodies estimation.

And our economy is on cruise control with the stock market going up every day. Oh sure there's companies that are laying off thousands but those folks should just consider themselves FOOT SOLDIERS in
the war for higher stock prices. The wealthy have to eat too you
know.

And any of you that think the 10.7 billion that Exxon made in the last quarter is excessive or would even dare to think price gouging are just wrong, wrong, wrong. I know that for sure because

President Bush said so and not unlike George Washington, he has
never told a lie. (It must just be something about that name GEORGE)

And you will never hear of scandal like Clinton getting oral sex touching this president. Like I said, he is a man of high morals and DEEP faith. So you can bet that when you hear about things like Halliburton getting no bid contracts our president has looked into it and knows that they are giving us the absolute best price.
If they weren't they wouldn't be getting the job.

No, no you people never had it so good so quit your gripeing and vote republican this year so we can see that George has the good republican congressmen and senators he needs to keep this country moving in the RIGHT direction.

He is probabl


Submitted by TRUTLAND on February 02, 2006 - 11:55 AM.

Yes, we will vote republican during the next election because we are smart enough to see the world for what it is and not fall for the crap printed by the liberal media.


Submitted by fabian on February 03, 2006 - 6:21 PM.

Suck it up people. Bush isn't FDR but he ain't the antichrist either. London, Madrid, Bali, the Phillipines and others have been targets of terror attacks post 9/11. You'll notice that the U.S. isn't on that list. The whole WMD fiasco is not put into perspective. Iraq had them. They shipped much of the gas and bio-weaponry into Syria while the UN was snipe-hunting and wrist-slapping.


Submitted by motengator22 on February 04, 2006 - 2:46 PM.

as the saying goes...
Vote Democrat it is easier than getting a job.


Submitted by alstone88 on February 04, 2006 - 7:40 PM.

yall voted,now rep the benefits. NO JOBS


Submitted by rcpasc48 on February 05, 2006 - 9:30 AM.

I have enjoyed reading or better put decoding some of the verbage, syntax, punctuation and spelling above. You are kidding aren't you?
Anyone with an education can tell who among you belong to the ABB crowd and who doesn't.
The post that seems to have an education behind it put it best "Vote Democrat it is easier than getting a job."
It really shows.
Perhaps when one learns sentence structure, spelling and punctuation, one can get that job one seems to be lacking.
I'm looking at the want ad section in the Augusta Chronicle and it is screaming for educated, skilled people to fill positions.


Submitted by masonellison on February 07, 2006 - 3:50 PM.

I tell you people if yall don't like how this country is run you have two ways to change it vote or get out. As a citizen i am proud of how we are. and i and my fathers have done the same. If you think for one second that the world can wait till we fix our problems your wrong we tried it before (WWII) and look what happened. Wake up people get out and just fix it. That's why they hate us because of our freedoms and there will always be someone to pick up that riffle protect our homes and those freedoms. George has been one of the best presidents this country has ever seen so grow up and live your life because with the right people in office you can. Do yall want to lose what we have so good? i for one don't and that's why i get up and do my job