The Masters Ala ESPN

I know this doesn't match the theme of this blog and I know that I promised my next entry would have information about places you have never heard of in Hawaii, but I am still working on photos for that and I have to get this off my chest. Please bear with me.

The Masters on ESPN!???!?!!?!

What are they thinking at the Augusta National Golf Club? I just read in the Chronicle that the Thursday and Friday rounds of the Masters tournament will be moving from the USA network to ESPN next year. Have they not watched Monday Night Football since ESPN stole it from it's orginator and fellow Disney sibling ABC? And to make it worse, the article said that MNF commentator Mike Tirico wil be the host!

I hope and pray that they do not also bring in fellow MNF host Tony Cornheiser. That would be the icing on the cake. Maybe they will bring the whole Monday Night Football crew. I can hear it now:

Mike: Well, Tony and Jaws, it certainly has been an interesting round so far today. I wonder how many will make the cut tomorrow. It may be a large group since everyone is so close.

Tony: That is not what is important, Mike. I tried to talk to several of the members about why they do not host a women's  Master's Tournament here and they would not comment. It is like a complete news blackout here. How can they expect us to do our job if they will not talk to us about the most important issues facing us today!

Ron "Jaws" Jawarski: Tony, I think they just want to focus on this tournament right now and we probably should too. Our job is to report what is happening at this tournament. In fact, it looks like Tiger Woods is about to putt on 16 now. Let's take a look a that.

Tony: No! Wait a minute! I have someone to talk to right here in the booth. Let's talk to Ms. Burke about why the Augusta National Golf Club is so evil and why golf is racist and sexist while we show Tiger putt in a tiny window in the corner of your television sets.

Ron "Jaws" Jawarski: Tony! Stop it now! We are here to cover a golf tournament. For the love of God, man. This is not a talk show like The View or Oprah Winfrey! Please just shut-up and let's get back to golf! I am begging you! Mike, back me up here.

Mike: We will be right back after this brief commercial message...

...30 seconds later...

Mike: We are back now with live coverage of The Masters. I am Mike Tirico and I am here with Tony Cornheiser. Our colleage Ron Jawarski will not be with us anymore as he is not politcally correct enough. Now let's get back to Tony's important interview while we completely ignore the golf tournament. Tony?

Tony: Thanks Mike...

This is scary folks. Let's hope that ESPN either straightens up and flies right or screws it up so bad that The Augusta National members have no choice but to come to their senses and stay FAR away from ESPN-PC(Politically Correct).

I have only been gone since late June and it is already falling apart. What's next? Will the Augusta Commission have a meeting without a controversy? Will Austin Rhodes and Champ Walker become best buddies?

Aloha, Y'all!