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Recently i was taking norco for arthritis in my back due to nothing else worked.After several months i would take 1 and a half,then 2 at a time due to it was not working,after awhile when i tryed to stop taking them the withdrawals was so bad that i would take more of them to stop the withdrawals,it got to where i was taking 5 or 6 at a time because the withdrawls was so bad.When i realised what was happening i sunk so low into depression that i was lost.Between being trapped by the cycle of withdrawls and depression was hell,i dont wish that on anyone,mine was so bad i compare it to torrets syndrome,thats how bad my shaking,restlessness got i actually thought about killing myself.Then me and my great wife was going to work i told her,i asked her to go to my dr with me and make sure i told him,yesterday i did,he didnt look down on me,he said he was sorry for me going through this.
There really aint nothing to help the withdrawals,theres whatthey call RAPID DETOX,where you go to the hospital and they put you to sleep for 12-16 hours and pump you with drugs to speed up the withdrawals,but the patient has convulsions,throwing up in their sleep some has died.
Then there is methadone,which is not a narcotic technically,it actually binds to your brain so you cant get the high from narcotics,thats the treatment i chose.
My heart goes out to who has ever or is going through that,i know what it feels like,people say its willpower,its not that simple,the withdrawls are painfull ,exhausting,scary.
I felt like dying yesterday,if it was not for my loving wife and my great dr i would have killed myself yesterday,its a rough thing to go through,if you are going through it there is treatments out there to get past withdrawls,dont be ashamed,i hope i can help one person to find the courage to get help,thanks to my wife ,my dr,they gave me the courage,i hope you find it to.
Posted by hbk459 on October 12, 2006 - 1:04 AM I have always heard that there was a great fault line that goes through every state in the south east,central us,its name is the GREAT MADRID fault line,recently as 3 days ago there was a 2.5 quake on the fault,in the past about every 27-35 years in the late 1800's and early 1900's there was quakes in ga and sc,i remember when hugo hit sc there was a 3.0 quake was detected under the damn at clarks hill.Does anyone know if the emergency management team in augusta has plans if a quake hits and causes damage there?there was several small quakes here in alabama last week,yes there are so small you dont really feel them but the madrid fault will rupture again,i think the recent small quakes are signs that a bigger one is on the way.With all the plants in the southeast that can cause severe damage if they are damaged does anyone have plans to deal with it?thats my qustion?Augusta is close to a very dangerous plant SRS,what would happen if a quake happens miles away and srs is severly damaged,are people ready,able to respond?There has been so called physics,prophets who has predicted that the madrid fault will wake up and shake so long and so hard that it splits the us in half,laugh if you want no one really knows what power is under our feet,take heed,plan,ask qustions your well being could be at stake.iam not trying to scare anyone or cause an uproar i want people to know the dangers and know what to do if and when it happens,and its going to happen,just because people are on this planet does not mean mother earth is going to keep quit just because we are here.
Posted by hbk459 on July 23, 2006 - 3:08 AM Earlier this week in tampa fla the most vile,despicable,sick thing happen.A lady walks next door to confront her neighbor,after she confronts the sick neighbor she walked away with a smile and $600.00,when she got home she sends her 7 year old son back to the neighbors house and received $600.00 everytime she sent him over there.The neighbor was molesting the 7 year old,he told his mom she went to confront him but somehow came out thinking it was ok,the only way the cops found out the boy told his 13 year old sister and she had the guts to call the cops who did the right thing and arrested the mom and neighbor they are in jail with no bail.How can a parent prostitute their child out?Those 2 assholes ruined that kids life and his sisters life,i know some where someone is saying wheres the father screw that the mom sold / rented her son for sex!she needs to be put to death just like that sorry s.o.b who molested that 7 year old kid,what in the hell is this world coming to?
Posted by hbk459 on April 01, 2006 - 3:33 AM Last friday the phone rang so i answered it,in the background i heard my youngest daughter screaming,the nurse said shed been crying for over an hour,i told her i would be there in a second,i called my wife and went to the school.we got her in the car,she looked so out of it,she dozed off,we knew she shouldnt go to sleep but she look so tired,after 5 minutes or so she woke up screaming,said her head was hurting,we get to the er,checked in,there was 6 or 7 people there,iam no dr but they didnt look serious,meanwhile i held her,she cried and cried in pain her eyes got blood shot,i starting freaking out,i go up to the nurses stations and i asked how much longer,she said about an hour,meanwhile she got limp,i looked at the nurse i said please help me,she said you got to wait,so i said some words and left,went to a clinic,they couldnt see her eaithier,even though the nurse said she looked bad,so we eventually went to another clinic,we sat in the room i was holding her thinking she was going to die,i thought she had a blood clot or something,i started crying,everyone in the room just looked at me,her eyes rolled back into her head,i screamed somebody please help her,they call her back,we get back there the dr examines her,iam glad to say it was a migraine,my 6 year old daughter has migraines,if she has them so many times each month she might have to take medication for the rest of her life.i was so scared,my other daughter was in shock i think,my wife was very scared.my daughter has had one thing after another she was borned with a heart murmor,suppose to outgrow it,rsvp,just so many things she has had to deal with but she still runs around with a smile,i sometimes think she is to good to be here,she is my strength,she is my motivation,thank you paris bales for being my daughter.
Posted by hbk459 on February 28, 2006 - 8:33 AM on super bowl night the Smiths was at home,the wife saids i hear someone crying,the husband dismisses it,seconds later a light knock is at the door,he goes,opens it up,what he sees will change his life for ever.There was a 5 year old boy on his knees crying,over to the left there was a 6 month old little girl,he yells for his wife,they get the kids inside,he asked the boy wheres your parents,the boy said mom is down the road,at first he thought what a lot of people would have thought she left these kids down the road,he then asked the boy again when getting his thoughts back on track,the boy said shes down the road bleeding,i think shes dead.so the husband goes to his car goes down the road sees the mangeled car,thinking what later on in a tv interveiw he would say,this child carried his sister down this busy street and no one stopped,he gets out,trys to get the lady out of the car then finally someone stops and asked if he needs help,the cops,ambulance gets there gets the lady out,she stays in a coma for days.They was driving home and her cell phone rang she went to answer it,lost control of the car it flipped over 3 times busting out all the windows,then this 5 year old who could not wake his mom up gets his baby sister walks over 1 mile on a busy road stops at house after house knocking on doors,all of that to save his sister and mom.all those cars passed him by not 1 car stopped,thats what mr smith asked in his only interveiw,he said the boy was a hero and why didnt anyone stop to ask him why is he walking down this busy road with a baby?Thats the other tragedy,how can so many people see this and do nothing?i hope this is not the moral fabric spreading throughout the usa,my heart goes out to that little boy and his family,he is in every sense of the word a real life hero.
Posted by hbk459 on February 26, 2006 - 4:58 AM I need a favor,i want to make child support tax deductible.
You would think that it is but its not,i pay 192.00 every 2 weeks and its hard,i think people like me who pay their support ought to have the choice to claim it even if the person who receives it dont have to claim it.
It would make more people incline to pay the support,knowing they will get rewarded at the end of the year,money wise that is.
it would help people who is struggeling to pay it also,if they make people who get it claim it on their taxes it would probally stop some of the false support claims also if the person getting support has to file it,iam opened eithier way on that.
i sent the irs email asking them to change the law,i sent the governor,senate emails asking,i even sent one to busch,he will never read it i know.please if you would send your senator a line asking to change this,thanks
Posted by hbk459 on February 03, 2006 - 5:34 AM The other day my wife came home and took off her shoes placed them by the front door,the next morning they was gone,we looked and looked,when i got my kids up we looked again but no luck.That night the same thing,shoes by the door,next morning they was gone.Well today i was reading a letter from a preacher i got,the lights went off then back on,i saw something out of the corner of my eye,like a rat.i walk to the bedroom door and by the end of the couch by the bedroom door the first pair of shoes,they was not there before,4 people turned this house upside down 2 days in a row,what in the hell caused this?
Posted by hbk459 on February 01, 2006 - 12:40 PM For some strange unknown reason me and a few people was talking about how and when we thought the end of the world would happen.
So afterwards i went to the net because some of the things that was said, i heard somewhere else,i kept winding back at 2012,the end of the MAYAN CALENDER.Does anyone else know a little about this?What is your thoughts on this?
Posted by hbk459 on January 23, 2006 - 5:47 AM Last night my youngest daughter started crying,i asked her why?
After a couple of minutes she asked why cant she see her mema?
Because she got sick in her lungs she asked?I sat there and was in shock,its been awhile since they have talked about my mom.
Then i tryed to explain to her that her mema was in heaven and she will get to see her one day in heaven.When i see one of my kids cry because they hurt emotionally or physically,it hurts me,i start crying.After a minute she said she missed her mema
and she wanted to see her,i hugged her and told her that i missed her to,i finally said in the morning i would find her a
picture with her and her mema,well she just got up and asked about it,so iam off to find a picture,i hope this helps her,
thanks for reading.
Posted by hbk459 on January 16, 2006 - 8:11 AM Recently i worked for a retail chain, i did so for over 10 years,gave that company everything i had, i put my job first.
I missed out on a lot of things with my kids,i even left my mom on her death bed to go back to work because i was afraid
of losing my job due to fact the dm told me i was needed more at the job than with her,i went back to work but the next day i went back to mom,she held on till i got there,thank god.
I am not proud of that, but i cant change it,
Every company has policys on what to do when certain situations arise,its beleived if you follow those policys you will be o-k.
In august i was approached by several workers,they informed me that the other assistant manager was involved in theft,at first i dismissed it but more people came foward so i followed company policy,i contacted the A P person,i made it clear that my name was not to be mentioned in the investigation process,especially to the DM, it was a known fact that the dm and the ast mgr was having an affair,thats why i wanted my name not mentioned.
Well he told the DM who inturned came to our store and told the ast mgr,meanwhile i had to tell the store mgr what was going on,he was not happy,he was mad at me,this started a chain of events that lead to my termination.
The retail world is not like other jobs,there are ways
they get rid of people,they make them jump through hoops,
always make their job impossible to do then cuss them out about it.After a while they wear you down to where you just want out,
or they get you so mad that you lose your temper and get fired or they make you quit.Its not suprising that at times they get freinds to call and complain about the person they want out.
i was always made to be severly shorthanded so i could not do my job to the best of my ability,the other ast mgr even came on to me knowing i was not gay,in the hopes i would get mad and cuss him out and get fired but i didnt.Besides the theft thing also in august i was offered a chance to join a class action lawsuit against this company,after thinking about the situation i joined the lawsuit,it was about a week or 2 after they found out about it i was terminated.we was in the office arguring,i get up and say iam going to finish the truck,i open the door,took abiut 3 steps the sm yells give me your keys so i tossed them to him,they say i just walked out,they lied.
Now they are blackballing me,even though i have over 5 years mgt experience its been rough getting another job,i won unemployment,but they appealed and won of course.
When you get a job and love that job and put your heart and soul into it you would think they would treat you fair, and look out for you.For those people who has pondered a future in retail
becarefull,pick you a partner when you get there,someone who will watch your back.Thanks for reading this long ramble.
Posted by hbk459 on January 13, 2006 - 6:17 AM What if everything we believed in,relegion,time and space,are we alone,was wrong.What if all the relegions did not exist or all them was true and there was several higher powers?
What if we have been visited by aliens and the gov has been covering it up,what if there was deminsions and time travel.
IOn new york there is a man who made over 300,000.00 in about 2 weeks in the stock market,said he was from the future,they put him in jail and there is no record of his birth anywhere,what if he is telling the truth?Would people freak out?
If there was aliens here would people freak out,would society collapse?What if all relegions was true,especially the tree of life as mentioned in the bible,would people come so greedy for life that they destroy the tree or each other.Some scientist
in japan has found a new tree that is hundreds of millions of years old,what if that is the tree of life?They cant kill the tree it seems to regenerate itself unlike other trees.
Everytime there is a history or world changing event they give
the info to us very slow,but denie it along the way,remember cloning?Up untill the daybefore they said they did it,they all said its 20 or 30 years away,if you have noticed there has been alot of movies,commercials,talk about life outside our planet,
are they getting us ready? Just ponder the possibilities?
Posted by hbk459 on January 05, 2006 - 7:49 AM One thing we all have in common is we all have parents,they might not live with us but we all got them.
The other day my 6 year old PARIS walked up to me and said thank you,she appreciated me taking care of her for the last 3 days because she was sick.I was touched,i cryed after she left the room,and after a while i thought she did something i never did,that was tell my dad thank you and tell him how much i appreciated him.That really bothers me,i promised myself after he passed that i would tell my mom,i did,i know she heard me and everyone because as me and my oldest girl HILLERY told her everything we wanted her to know a tear fell down her face,even though she was really out of it she knew,iam very greatfull i had that chance.A lot of people dont though,so take it from someone who learned the hard way tell your parents thank you,tell them you appreciate them because 1 day they wont be here
and you will regret it for the rest of your days, i know because i wish i would have said things to my dad,i regret not doing that till this day.
Posted by hbk459 on January 03, 2006 - 6:50 AM When i was a youngster i had the priveladge of going to Fleming
on hwy 25,now its a different school,but the times i have had a chance to visit and i rode past there it always put a smile on my face.The good times,the bad times,the crush i had on my 4th grade teacher MRS CISICK,who i thought was so beautifull,well she was,to the teachers who did not like me,MRS SWEETENBURG,she respected me but did not like me,that taught me something that i still use to this day,you can dislike someone but respect them.
I fell in love,had my heart broke,that taught me how to bounce back from bad situations.We often overlook just how important those days really was,for alot of people they learned
important life lessons,some came away with nothing,i feel for those people,some say college is the best time in your life or high school i have to disagree,the 4 years i spent on peach orchard rd at fleming was the best school years,it made me who iam today,it made me see what i did not want to become,thank you
to all my teachers,the principal MR ELAM, all my freinds
who i shared that experince with,without each and every one of you there would be no me,thank you.
Posted by hbk459 on January 02, 2006 - 8:58 AM When i lived in augusta off of hwy 25,by ivey rd,i had a few weeks of something till this day i cant explain,dont want to really,but i do want to share it.It all started when my girlfreind at the time moved in ,i was not happy after a awhile,but she stayed,i started having these really bad dreams
so bad that i got her to stay up,so when they started she could wake me up,she actually saw me being dragged off the bed one night,i woke up i was almost on the floor.NO KIDDING!We would be watching tv in the bedroom,2 red eyes would appear on the wall,start going around the room,spinning,faster and faster,she would be screaming i would be crawling on the floor trying to turn the light on.The tv would start changing channells,it wouldnt even be on sometimes,it would just come on,the sound would go up and up,even after i unplugged it.It got so bad that i actually was going to get a preist to come and bless the room.
Then we split up,then it stopped,just that quick,so i actually got rid of a demon that was haunting me,it appeared
to be the girl i was with at the time.This is a true story,it can be backed up by several people still in augusta.
Posted by hbk459 on December 29, 2005 - 12:26 PM Its strange how a person can hear a song or see a picture and the mind goes back to years before, to that very moment.
The smell you smelt when you heard that song with someone,
or where you took a picture.The other day i was cleaning out my closet and i found a bunch of old tapes,of course i stuck them in my tape player and listened.All these memories started pouring back,smells, everything.Mostly i thought of my first true love,the girl i first kissed,i sat there and wondered where she was,what she is doing,whatever she is doing iam sure she is very successfull,she was very smart.I always thought our paths would cross and a part of me thought what if,what if we got married,how things would have turned out.I hope she is happy,
healthy ,and i have been thinking of her after all of these years.people take life,other people for granted,its human nature.
i took the best time of my childhood for granted and now i would give anything to go back to it just for a day so i could
smell the smells,hear the laughs of freinds,see her perfect smile just once more,i cant, so i go on living with memories of
days of old.Today iam going to make new memories,and today i will not take things for granted because it does not matter what you say about someone after they are gone ,it matters how you treat them while they are here.
Posted by hbk459 on December 22, 2005 - 11:48 AM Everyone has choices,some are hard choices some are easy choices,
i want to tell about a choice a freind of mine made.
For about 17 years this freind we will call him HB lived with severe pain everyday.Pain so great that he would have to get in the closet and cover his head because everything made it worse.
He has a compressed fracture in his back,once his back started hurting it would go up his neck then to his head.He could barely turn his head,drs gave him vioxx,bextra,before they got pulled off the market,nothing worked, he spent money on a chiropractor,it did not work, he finally went to a dr that explained to him that arthritis has done set in and its going to get worse.The dr gave him percoet 10,he thought it would not work but after about an hour he could move,his pain was all but gone,needless to say he was very happy.He finally could get down on the floor and play with his kids,just have a normal life.
All of that came to a halt once he realised he had a good chance to get hooked on the drugs,he only took the 4 day that was directed,very seldom would he take more,he read up on it,come to find out that after a while even if you stop taking the pills they can cause you to have a sudden heartattack.
So what to do? live life free of pain or in pain?
Hope he dont have a heart attack due to the drugs,he was in a pickle.Well he is still taking the drugs but he is free of pain,
what would you do?
Posted by hbk459 on December 21, 2005 - 5:55 AM |
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