Do we need a new motto that matters?

Got an idea for a new motto for our United States?
Author Stephen Dubner and his associates started a contest to create a new motto for the nation -- six words or less.

The exercise inspired hundreds of entries, and they selected a winner: “Our worst critics choose to stay.”

The New York Times even did a story on the contest and asked readers for their suggestions. So far there were more than 1,300 posted.

 Among them:
_ “Just like Canada, with better bacon”
_ “Mine, mine, mine! (Repeat)”
_ “Where’s the free stuff?? Vote Democrat!”
_ “No, we still don’t like soccer”
_ “We came. We saw. We conquered. “
_ “USA! USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!”
_ “Bush, Clinton, Bush, Clinton? Deja Vu?”
_ “One Nation, Under Canada, Above Mexico.”
And my favorite?
_ “That’s MISTER America to you, pal!”

Anyway, these are all sort of fun, because it gives you the chance to distill what America means down to the fewest words.
If you’ve got a good idea, send it along.

What's your favorite place to show off Augusta?

People like to talk about their good vacations.

They like to share the sights, the sounds, the food, the experiences. The photos, the home movies. How much money they spent and how much money they saved.

But what about the other vacations? You know, the disasters?

Bad vacations can mean lost luggage, the long lines, the rude co-travelers, the surly inhabitants of where it was you went.

They can mean food poisoning, sunburn. The jelly-fish attacks and a bear at the tent door.

They can be the reservation that was forgotten, the child left behind or the pet who bolted at the rest-stop and was finally captured in the ladies restroom, which provoked further complications.

Why not share your story here? It will not only help in the healing process on your journey to closure, we might learn a lesson.

Or we can all share a laugh one day like me and two ladies  from Michigan I once met in a rest stop restroom while looking for a cat.

Name the sites on an All-America vacation

This is the time of year that many of us hit the road and go on vacation.

Well, I'm making a list. What are the places every American should visit, at least some time in his or her life?

The quick list I've got for my "must see" vacation lineup includes:

The Statue of Liberty, Independence Hall, the White House, U.S. Capitol, Grand Canyon, Alamo,
Arlington National Cemetery, the Rocky Mountains, Golden Gate Bridge and the “Hollywood” sign.

I’ve seen all the sites on my list except the last one, but I keep thinking I’m missing something.

What do you think we should add and why?

You call this traffic?

No really. Where is the absolute closest thing we have to a regular traffic jam?

Washington Road between Alexander and I-20?

It's the west Augusta commuting curse. In the morning, you drive into the sun. At night going home, you drive into the sun.

Bobby Jones Expressway south of Gordon Highway?

So many pickups, so little berm. I feel like I'm driving on a ridge.

Riverwatch in the morning?

Wrightsboro Road in front of the mall?

Walton Way at the end of the day?

Think the lanes are narrow now? You should have navigated them with the land yachts of the late 1950s.

Tell me what you think.

Who would you name something for?

.

Naming things after celebrities brings up all sorts of possibilities, mostly because celebrities dote on attention, and often show up when anything -- from an elementary school to a star on the sidewalk -- has their name on it.

Our fair city can always use the positive attention.

I suggested we might look for some new names on such items as the 13th Street Bridge, which links Augusta and North Augusta, S.C.

I think the Calhoun Expressway is good for renaming.

And someone else has suggested naming Walton Way Extension (and Davis Road) after Jack Nicklaus. Such a suggestion drew notice, and the usual competitive response of “What about Arnold Palmer Parkway?”

Well, what do you think?

What do we have around town that we can easily name for somebody famous, and get them to show up for dedication?

What would you do with lottery winnings?

My wife was up bright and early Wednesday to see if she won the big Mega-Million Lottery drawing.

She didn’t, but that's OK. One of the fun things about lottery expectations is secretly planning what you would do with all the money.

I know I’d try to buy a share of the Augusta GreenJackets. Maybe not a big share, but one large enough that they’d have to let me pinch hit every now and then.

I might buy one of the old movie theaters around town and show only movies I liked. I wouldn’t worry if ticket sales were low -- the profit's in the popcorn.

What about you?

If you had won that lottery the other night, what would you do with the money?

Shaking leaves on the family tree

This week a New York newspaper connected Al Sharpton’s ancestors to Strom Thurmond’s, and it got me to thinking about anyone well-known I might be related to.

The short answer is: nobody.

My ancestors got to this country in the 1630s and began a long tradition of avoiding attention. On a positive note, they stayed out of jail.

On a negative note, none made fortunes.
None invented things.
None owned lots of land.
None were war heroes.

We pretty much stayed under the radar, even before they invented radar.
For that reason I’ve always been a little jealous of people related to famous folks.
With that in mind, maybe you can tell me – are you related to anybody famous?

Do you have an ancestor that gives you a story to tell at church socials or cocktail parties?

Tell me about it.

Tell me about your dog

You would think the trend line would be going the other way, but I don't think it is.

Here's why.

In the past, a cat or a dog was simply a nice little animal that pretty much had the run of the place -- outside.
It ate what it could find, occasionally supplemented with some store-bought grub. It grew up; it grew old. It died and was buried in a brief ceremony in the back yard.

Today's pet, however, is an investment. It needs a license, it needs shots. It needs a fenced-in yard or a leash for public travel. You can't feed it table scraps anymore, because we no longer live where we can throw them out the back door.

Pets need attention ... and we give it to them.
Our spouses are job-stressed; our children are school-stressed. But our pets remain loyal, consistent, glad to see us.

At least mine does.

Tell me about yours.

Here comes the ice storm!

Tell them we might get the mysterious “wintry mix,” which includes ice, sleet, freezing rain and possibly polar bears.

Tell them local temperatures are going to plummet, throwing the fear of February into birds and car batteries.

Tell them the pine trees might start snapping the power lines, and the water pipes might start freezing, and the kids who were so happy to stay home from school, have no idea what to do, locked in a house with no electrical devices working.

Tell them all this then get out of the way while they rush to the grocery to buy bread and milk.

Why do we do it?

You tell me.

What do we do about downtown graffiti?

Somebody said it was gangs, but the cops think it's only skateboarders.

Well, I count three options.

A. We can ignore it. Only often when you ignore a problem like graffit, it proliferates.

B. We can criminalize it, which we quickly did this week. Merchants are now offering a $1,000 reward to finger the downtown DaVincis.

C. Or we could offer a big blank wall space where graffiti tagging is allowed and encouraged.
Think of it as a big urban art contest. The mayor could award monthly blue ribbons to the winners. Maybe they could even perform their art during First Fridays.

Got a better idea?

You be a lawmaker!

This week the legislatures in Georgia and South Carolina return for their annual rounds of lawmaking.

As someone who spent time reporting for this newspaper (and others) on the General Assembly, I like to think it used to be more entertaining.

There were more characters, and you didn’t know what they were truly up to, because they didn’t know what they were truly up to, either.

These days, everyone takes it seriously and the General Assembly often resembles a big Rotary convention.

Still, I think if there was any fun to be had, it would be in becoming a lawmaker for a day.

Just think, if you had the chance of pushing one law, one issue, one bit of lasting impact for the state – what would it be?

A cut in taxes? A law that helps children and old people?

Mandatory "Casual Fridays"?

Let me know.

Then maybe we can let them know.

Where Do We Bury James Brown?

Last weekend's funeral showed just how much attention Augusta gets from one of its favorite sons.

Like many, I guess I thought Mr. Brown would be buried with his family. Then before the funeral, we began to hear about a plan to bury him on his Beech Island property and turn his home into a tourist destination like Elvis with Graceland in Memphis.

Then this week we reported that many in Augusta wouldn't mind having the "Godfather of Soul" buried somewhere on this side of the river.

So what do you think?

Would a James Brown gravesite attract visitors like his statue on Broad Street? Or should South Carolina be the final resting place for its native son?