back in augusta

Well I'm back. Tomorrow I actually head back to work. I can barely tell these days that I've had surgery. I apologize for being so lax the past couple weeks about keeping y'all informed. But there really wasn't anything new to report.

It seems all of my internal organs that I have left have finally found a new spot inside after slightly shifting from extra space. My laproscopic scares on my torso are starting to fade away and my incision scar is itchy, so that's a sign that it's healing. I feel like I've gotten most of my energy back even though I feel lazy and out of shape. My four-week restriction of not being able to lift more than 10 pounds will be up Wednesday so I want to resume my yoga classes as soon as possible.

But besides me, Annie is doing well although she's had to make a return trip to the hospital. She's contracted a bacterial infection that the doctors say is quite normal for transplant patients. She just basically feels like crap. Annie says she'll probably be in the hospital for another three or four days, and that the kidney is still working just fine. It's working just as it should.

The last time I checked, Annie and I raised $2,700 for our account with the National Transplant Assistance Fund. It's been a huge help to help me cover transportation costs and lost wages.

This whole process has changed my life and really caused me to re-evaluate what I want to do with my life. I want to help others and I'd like to continue to advocate organ donation. I've seen firsthand just how wonderful the gift can be.

As I end this, I'd like to end it on an even happier note: Yesterday, my boyfriend of 3.5 years asked me to marry him. And of course, I said yes. Both of our families are ecstatic, and I couldn't think of another man that I'd like to share the rest of my life with. I guess all good things come to those who wait.

iowa

We made it back to Iowa early and safe and sound. We were supposed to get on the noon flight to Omaha, but we managed to squeeze onto the 9 a.m. My parents were very happy to be home, and I'm just glad I can FINALLY relax and do nothing. But I do still wish I was still back in Arizona.

Annie called yesterday and said her doctors felt everything was working just fine, so that's great news! :)

Well, I thought I had more time but dad just made lunch so I've gotta go. The onslaught of friends start tomorrow. My friend Chris and his girlfriend Jenny, and then my friend Cavan and his partner Scott, are coming to visit tomorrow. Yay for long-lost friends! :)

60 seconds

I requested my medical records today at the Mayo Clinic Hospital and I absolutely loved reading over them! They had notes on my visit in May and my stay last week. They even had a summary of my surgery and it was so cool! :) I read that to get ready for the actual transplant, I was in surgery for an hour. The time to actually remove the kidney: 60 seconds. Can you believe that???!!! That is so amazing. I tell ya, these guys really know what they're doing. :)

Well, I'm heading to Iowa tomorrow and I'm filled with different thoughts and emotion. I'm sad because I don't want to leave Annie and I feel like I've laid down some sort of roots here in Arizona. A part of me will always be here, literally! I'm nervous because I'm afraid of something going wrong with me medically and being so far away from the Mayo professionals. I don't think I'd like to trust anyone else but them. But then a part of me is happy because I'm going to my old bed, my old house and seeing people from my past: friends and family. Overall, I can't believe it's over. I'm so happy that everything turned out OK, and I know that if I had a chance to do this all over again, I would do it in a heartbeat. This whole experience, this whole summer, has truly changed my life. A part of me doesn't want to let go.

Jeez, I'm starting to cry again. I better stop all these dramatics!

The next time I write, I'll be in good 'ol Sioux City, Iowa. Take care! :)

excitement

Annie completely turned around Tuesday and today, she was released from the hospital. My parents and I were able to be with her when we walked out. It was quite an event: Annie had my mom manning the video camera and I had people take pictures. She was so excited to be outside and away from the hospital, and I was excited for her. I started to tear up as well, just knowing that it was all over and all was well.

Earlier today, I had my post-op meeting with my surgeon, Dr. Andrews and his assistant, Howard Asahi. I was in and out in 20 minutes. I met with Howard first and he took a look at my incisions and pulled off two pieces of tape from my puncture wounds. He said the other pieces of tape would be ready for removal in a few days. I think I'll let my mom do that. I just don't think I could make myself do it. Anyway, I had Howard sign Annie's transplant T-shirt (she's been having all of her doctors and nurses sign it) and he was happy to do it. Then a couple minutes later Dr. Andrews came in. He said he didn't have to look at my incision because he trusted Howard. He asked how I was doing on my Vicodin and I told him that I had taken the last one this morning. He said if I needed any more that I could stop by before I left town but I told him that probably wouldn't be necessary. I don't hurt at all right now, besides from uncomfortable bloating. I had him sign the shirt, too. Then when he got up to go I hugged him and, tearfully, told him thank you for his good work (if it weren't for him, I wouldn't be here or feeling this good). He shrugged it off and told me thank you for being so generous. I nearly lost it. God, I'm so weepy! :) Anyway, he left and I gathered up my emotions and walked out of the doctor's office a free woman.

We threw a birthday party for the house coordinator today. She turned 50 and had a yummy cake and ice cream (I indulged a little -- I'm lactose intolerant), and she opened the gifts that we got her. It was so much fun to sit, talk and laugh around the big dining room table with everyone. You really feel like family.

Earlier today during lunch (I'm jumping all over the place), we were at the Mayo Clinic Hospital and talking with Mike, who's originally from Iowa and is staying at the transplant house while his 30ish-year-old son is in ICU after a pancreas transplant (his son's new pancreas is fine, but he's having lots of trouble with nausea). Anyway, I got up to go to the bathroom and I walked out into the atrium near the elevators and I saw a man laying face down with several people laying on top of him. I saw a cane above his head and a spilled soda and I figured he had fallen and possibly having a seizure. When I got out of the bathroom, I saw a couple of police officers on top of him yelling "Don't move sir, don't move! .... or we'll taze you!" Well.... he moved and he got tazed. Who knew I'd see someone hit with a Taser gun at a hospital. After a minute or so they were able to put handcuffs on him and sit him up. It ended up being a very spacey, scruffy 40ish-year-old guy.

Today has been just way too exciting. I'm going to bed!

amazing stories

It is so amazing to hear the stories that the people here at the transplant house tell. Their transplants have transformed their lives and letting them live longer than they had ever dreamed. One man here said his wife was so sick before her liver transplant that life was just miserable. Now she's bustling about in her turquoise green outfit and big pink hat to block out the Arizona sun. He told me today that when they knew she was nearing the top of the transplant list, she had packed a bag to be ready just in case; kind of like what they had went through for her pregnancies, he said. They had to be ready at a moment's notice to rush to the hospital. Another man had his liver transplant about three weeks ago and he's walking more than a mile every day early in the morning. His wife dotes on him and I can tell that she's incredibly happy to see him up and walking around again. We joke around because it seems every time I see them, they're at the dining room table eating in the same exact spot. :)

Another couple arrived last night and they have just an awesome story. He is a kidney and pancreas recipient who received his organs from a 17-year-old man a couple years ago. Apparently four weeks before his transplant he was given the opportunity to receive organs from an AIDS patient. He told my mom that he had to decide whether to eventually die from AIDS or to wait it out despite the fear of possibly dying of organ failure. Well, he did get lucky in the end. I thought at first it was strange that they would offer an AIDS patient's organs, but when you need two organs, the liklihood of finding them both is very small. Anyway, he and his wife are in town for their checkups and on Friday they're going to meet their donor's family. His wife told me that they've been in contact for several years now and wanted to finally make contact in person. She said it's going to be incredibly emotional. I can imagine. I only wish I was going to be here to witness it. It's just amazing that this teenager is living on in this man. I just can't imagine ...

Annie update: She threw up again last night and so this morning they put a tube down her nose and into her stomach to start sucking out the yucky stuff. It's made a little bit of difference but she's still in pain. Apparently it's the anti-rejection medication that she's on that is causing problems with her intestines -- and obviously they can't take her off of that. Her surgical team and a few other Mayo Clinic doctors had a meeting this morning to discuss her case and they're working to find a solution to her problem. But she won't be out until a couple more days. :( The kidney is still working though. We're just waiting for her intestines to follow.

letting it hang out

Aw man, my stomach is so bloated right now. But I'm doing what the nurses told me yesterday: eat lots of ruffage, so that means leafy greens, veggies. For dinner I had vegetable soup and half of a salad .... and then some cherry cheesecake. I couldn't resist. We spent our evening at the hospital in Annie's room. She was in some pain again this evening, but there's a nurse that's going to be watching over her tonight who seems very experienced with transplant patients. She recommended warm prune juice to get the bowels moving for her. Maybe I should take up that nurse's advice for myself.

I don't know if I wrote about this already, but I worked up the courage to look at my scars yesterday. They don't look gruesome at all. My incision is 3-4 inches long horizontally across my pubic bone. Then there are four laproscopic puncture wounds almost in a square on the right side of my torso. I took off those bandaids yesterday after my shower. Not too shabby. The puncture wounds don't hurt at all. Then, on my left side, I still have "yes" written in marker. When I was in the pre-op room, the nurse wrote "yes" so the surgeon would be sure to operate on that side. Well, since they took my right kidney -- on purpose -- the "yes" is a little humorous for me. Oh well. :) It's a funny souvenier.

Anyway, Drew left today. :( He had to head back to Augusta so he could get back to his job at ASU on Monday. I was very sad to see him go, and he was sad to go, too, but I'm glad he'll be there with Mookie (even though he was well taken care of by the neighbors!). I got to "chat" with Mookie on the phone today and he responded by running away from the phone. :) Awwww... Back to Drew though. He was a huge help. It has been funny this week having him here because he's been called every name he could be called: boyfriend, husband, brother, fiance, etc. I talked to his mom earlier today and she said her pastor at the Methodist church in Cleveland, Ga., talked about me and the transplant during his homily today. He said, "Drew Allen's fiancee gave her kidney to her cousin ..." Oops! :) But oh well. It's all the same really. He's my guy and that's all that matters.

tough days

Saturday was a rough day for Annie and I. After all of the good news and advances, we were bound to have our setbacks. Don't get alarmed though. Both kidneys are still working a-OK.

I got up early Saturday morning after taking my dose of vicodin and had breakfast. I sat with three other house visitors and Sheri, the house coordinator, and we talked while my dad made my family french toast. It's fun to hear the visitors' stories and how they made it hear. From what they've told me, they've been through plenty of health battles but their transplants have made a world of difference and "they're ready to start living again" as one of them told me. I think I'm the only donor here out of the bunch so they kind of look at me with this bright, shiny light. It definitely warms my heart.

At breakfast, though, I was feeling kinda dizzy so I layed down and took a two-hour nap that made me feel a lot better. But by then bloating had started to become a factor and was making me pretty uncomfortable. I called Annie before my nap and I had woken her up. She said she had a rough night and wasn't feeling well. During my nap my parents went to the hospital to go visit her.

My parents came back and then we all went to go see her a few hours later. She was in and out of a heavily medicated sleep and in a considerable amount of pain. She was very constipated and nothing was working for her. When she was transferred into a different bed to be wheeled down to get her bowels X-rayed, she said "Amber, I'm so sorry. I'm letting you down. Please don't be mad." It made me so sad to hear here say that, but I told her that I wasn't disappointed, that she'll be fine and get better soon. Nothing could make me disappointed in her.

I think being there and seeing her in so much pain made me feel really bad because I could just feel myself becoming sick. I asked my dad to take me back to the transplant house and so he, Kendall, Drew and I headed back, but we needed to stop at a grocery store to pick up a few things. I was so weak and tired, I got to ride in one of those motorized carts. I'm sure I looked pretty humorous to a lot of people. A nice older man helped me learn how to run it and soon I was slowly zooming off among the grocery aisles. The man told me he'd be watching me to make sure he wouldn't have to ticket me for speeding. I told him that he'd having nothing to worry about. :)

My main problem was that I was feeling really bloated and so we went to the store to buy a laxative. I did take it and I did feel some relief when I got home but it made me feel incredibly nauseous when I was trying to eat my meager dinner. I had my dad go and get me Sprite so I sipped that for an hour and when I felt better I nibbled on pretzels for another hour. I was still feeling nasty and gross but I was able to take my pain meds and go to sleep. One thing that I was excited about was that I was able to sleep on my right side for parts of the night. I can't tell you just how good it felt to relieve my back of some of the pressure.

officially a member

So now I'm a member of the one-kidney club and it feels pretty good. It feels even better being out of the hospital. I got up this morning at 6 a.m. because I wanted to be up and moving around for my doctors. I also went and visited Annie in her room while she was eating her early breakfast. She's on a more restricted eating routine because for some of her meds she has to have an empty stomach.

The docs were all impressed that I was up and about. Everything was looking good and my mom made sure that I got a picture with Dr. Andrews and some of the nurses that had been taking care of me. I was wheeled out of the hospital with some vicodin and some stool softeners, so that'll last me awhile. Annie and Kendall met me outside with a card and gift. I did really well controlling my tears then because they could've flowed pretty easily. The card read, "Words cannot describe just how special you are." Then she gave me an angel. It was an absolutely beautiful gift and I know I'll cherish it forever. We gave each other a very careful hug, making sure we weren't touching any of our incisions and then I was one my way to the transplant house.

People's reactions have been so sweet and wonderful when I tell them I've donated a kidney. One thing I forgot to mention in pt. 1 was that when I was laying in the stretcher in the pre-op room crying with my mom, a lady who had seen us in the waiting room and was standing across from us came over to say hello. She said she couldn't help but say that what I was doing was a noble thing and that she was very impressed. That, of course, made me cry harder but I managed to tell her thank you in between the sobs. Here at the transplant house, they've been equally as nice. There are two people here who are liver lobe recipients and are doing great. They're up walking around and socializing. It truly is a great atmosphere.

It feels good to be a part of the one-kidney club. But right now, I think it's time for some rest.

all is well (pt. 2)

I forgot to include something in the last blog. Annie was up and walking the night of the surgery. It was just amazing to see her up and at it. She was pretty hunched over and medicated, but she just looked so proud. I was very proud of her as well. The nurses weren't too sure about her getting up but she wasn't hearing any of it. She was getting up and that was final.

The first night didn't go so well. Drew stayed with me so that helped. I was so tired, but I woke up about every hour. I was hoked up to an IV and plus they came in every hour or so to check my body temperature, heartbeat, and blood pressure. They were giving me Toradol (sp?) and about 4 mg. of morphine. The morphine felt reeeeeally good but the Toradol wasn't doing anything. At 1 a.m., they gave me just some more toradol but during the next hour I just felt like I was getting worse. I stayed up and my mind just wandered. I'd get teary-eyed when I thought of Annie, and everytime I'd close my eyes I'd see people standing over me. I don't know if that was the drugs, or what ... it probably was. I think I eventually pushed the nurses button, the best nurse in the whole wide world, Steven, came in. He was my night shift nurse for the two nights I was there. I told him that I was feeling worse and asked him if I could have some more morphine. He checked the doctor's orders and I was cleared for another 2 mg. of morphine.

The whole night they had been checking my urine output. During the day I was going pretty good but that night I basically hadn't done anything. At 4 a.m., they started to worry -- which made me incredibly nervous. I started shaking and I had another nurse wake Drew up so he could be with me. I had Drew stroke my head and I just started bawling. The only thing that was going through my mind was: Oh my God, something is wrong with my kidney and they're going to have to do another surgery. I could feel my face starting to get tingly, which is usually a sign that I'm starting to hyperventilate. My stomach hurt so bad because I was shaking and sobbing. Steven came back in and just told me that everything was going to be fine, that this happens all the time with donors because our organs just like to shut down at night. He said they probably just needed to fiddle with my catheter, that maybe there was a kink somewhere. Sure enough, they worked with it a little and a little bit came out: enough where they weren't so worried anymore. I started to calm down but I didn't feel like going back to sleep, so I stayed up until 5 with Drew and I ate more jello and ice chips. I rang the nurse again and told her I felt like I needed to go to the bathroom and she fiddled with the catheter and out all of it came. Oh my lord, that was such a relief. :)

My doctors came by at about 7 a.m. that morning. Howard, the physician's assistant, came by first and asked to see my scars. He then removed the tape from my scar across my pubic bone. OWWWWWWW! Oh my God, that hurt soooo bad. I am such a wimp. But they said everything was looking good and I had better color. They were surprised that I hadn't gotten up to walk yesterday and gave me marching orders to have me up and walking at least four times.

I decided it was time to get up at about 10 a.m. I was so nervous because it was hugely complicated and I just knew it was going to hurt. I had to roll over onto my right side (the side where my kidney was taken), pull my feet off of the bed and then use my right elbow and left arm to push myself out of bed. I started bawling because I was so nervous, but I soon got my act together and got myself up with the assistance of my mom and two nurses, Laurie and Daniel, on the day shift. I couldn't believe just how good it felt to get out of bed. I had been itching it get out of bed because I was sick of laying down but I had been dreading it at the same time. Annie was already up and ready to go and was waiting for me in my room. She was coaching me the whole time I was trying to sit up.

I don't think I can properly express just how it felt to be making that lap around the nurse's station. There were so many people walking with us: my parents, Drew, Kendall, and all the other nurses ... it just seemed like everything came to a standstill. I was holding onto my IV tree, hunched over and I think Laurie had me at my elbow. Annie was walking slightly ahead of me. That was the moment where it all sunk in, just the amazing thing that I had done. Alfredo, the Yuma Star photograher, was taking pictures at all angles and the other nurses were just staring; they seemed to know what I was thinking. I was so overcome with emotion, I was bawling again (I cry a lot). I think this alarmed the nurses because Laurie kept asking me if everything felt OK, if I needed to sit down but I felt just fine. I was crying because my heart was just so happy.

What else happened Thursday? The rest of the day was pretty unremarkable. Oh yeah, they did disconnect my IV and they removed my catheter. I was visited by a woman I had met through livingdonorsonline.org. She was a liver lobe donor a couple years ago at the Mayo Clinic here and she gave me a card and two pins that I know I'll wear! :) Oh, and my transplant coordinator, Mira, stopped by to give me a hug and a T-shirt that I'm wearing now. I didn't eat much for lunch, but dinner was really good (yummy ravioli). I think we just took it easy and talked.

My mom did give me a sponge bath and it felt so good to be clean. The one thing that you have to do when you're in this situation is to have no shame. You just have to be comfortable with your body. Plus, your mom is your mom. She brought me into this world, so there's no need to be bashful. :)

I was so tired that night that I passed out at about 9:30. I only woke up twice, when Steven came in to give me more Toradol. By then my pain tolerance had risen and the Toradol was working for me. It was such good sleep.

all is well (pt. 1)

I'm back!! :) I just got back to the transplant house about 1 1/2 hours ago. Just had lunch and took some vicodin. So if I misspell anything or if something doesn't make any sense, I blame the drugs.

Where do I begin? Well, I guess I'll start from the beginning:

Wednesday morning I woke up feeling really nervous. We got up at about 4:30 a.m. and I got my "luxiurious" brown terry sweatsuit on from Old Navy. After showering and getting a bag packed for the hospital, we were on our way. I held Drew's hand in the back seat as we drove to the hospital. Things were tense.

When we got there, Annie and Kendall and the news crew were already there, as well as the the main PR lady with the hospital. She had to shadow the news crew for liability reasons. She was real nice though. I can't quite remember her name. Anyway... Annie had the camcorder going and we all said a few words. I wasn't really in the mood to say anything. When I'm nervous, I'm pretty quiet.

We then checked in with the hospital and I gave them my last directives form and signed a consent form for them to treat me. They did the same for Annie. Michelle tried to interview me but I was a woman of few words. We all then rode the elevator up to the surgery waiting room: Drew and I, Annie, Kendall, my parents, Michelle and Alfredo (the photographer), and the PR lady. We had quite the group. We then checked in with the secretary and we sat down for awhile. My mom was taking pictures of everyone and causing quite a commotion. Alfredo was taking pictures, too. Everyone else in the waiting room was just staring.

Soon, Annie and I were called into the pre-op room so we could get our IVs in, give a urine sample, talk with the anesthesiologist (sorry, I just butchered that), etc. They worked on Annie first so I just kind of tried to relax in the nearby stretcher. That was easier said than done. I think during this point in time, it was all sinking in and very surreal. There was no backing out now (not that I wanted to). I was starting to get teary-eyed because I knew that what I was about to do was going to change Annie's life for the better. I was very happy, but extremely nervous at the same time. Soon a nurse was working on me. She had me remove all of my clothes and put on a hospital gown. It took her a few times to put the IV in because my veins just weren't cooperating. Everyone there was so nice.

Pretty soon we were all ready and our families were called in to see us. The nurses moved my bed closer to Annie's and removed the curtain in between us. Kendall and his dad came in, as well as mine. We were all doing fine until they wheeled Annie because she had to get an IV in her neck. My mom gently patted her face as she was wheeled off and apparently Annie had tears in her eyes. So did Kendall. My mom turned around and she was crying... which then made me cry. She came over and kissed me on my forehead, leaving lipstick ... which made me cry and laugh at the same time. But the crying just made me feel so much better. I knew that I needed a good cry before I went so I'm glad we got it over with. Soon it was my turn to go, so and it was tear-free. They wheeled me in to the OR. I rememer it being very white, and my doctor, Dr. Andrews, had his surgical mask on and was sitting at a computer. I remember saying hi to him. The last thing I remember is looking up at the bright lights above me and nurses standing around me looking at me.

The next thing I remember is being wheeled into the recovery room. I was pretty out of it, but I don't recall being in too much pain. One of the nurses (who graduated from Iowa State, believe it or not) came and said everything went fine. He said the kidney immediately started working when they put it in Annie. I remember being so relieved and happy that I started crying again. I was just overcome. He also said that at the last minute, the doctors opted to take my right kidney over my left one because Annie's surgeon didn't want to work with my extra ureter and liked his chances with my right one because apparently I had an extra vein (I guess I was just born with all of these spare parts!). But hearing that everything was good just made me relax. I don't remember how long I was in the recovery room because the next thing I knew I was being wheeled to my room on the fourth floor. I do remember being slightly annoyed with the guy that wheeled me in because he asked me if I was in the hospital for "girlie surgery". ??? I guess since I was young he assumed I was having breast implants or something. I don't know but I set him straight and said I donated a kidney. :P

I saw Drew on the way to my room so he followed us in there. It really sucked when they transferred me into my hospital bed. Holy cow, the pain!

I'm trying to remember what else happened Wednesday but it's a litle foggy right now. I remember when Annie was wheeled into the room next door to me. I was really excited to see her. I remember seeing my parents when they came up, and Kendall, his dad and Kendall's sister and brother-in-law, Jeannette and Tony, came to see me. I started looking better as the night went on. But I was constantly eating ice chips because the meds were giving me a major case of cottonmouth.

Ok, now it's time for pt. 2. Please continue reading! :)

11 more hours to go

As I write this, I have 11 more hours until my surgery. It was moved up to 7:30 a.m., so I'll have to report to the Mayo Clinic Hospital at 5:45 a.m. (yikes, that's early!) The time change has made me more nervous, but I will survive. I'm so tired, I'm going to go to sleep here in a little bit.

So the trip was interesting. Drew and I woke up at 5 a.m. in Atlanta to make it to the nearest MARTA station in time. We got to the airport at about 6:45, and we checked in right away. Since Drew's flight left so early, I was going to follow him to his terminal and see him off. I was behind him going through security, BUT I was one of the lucky people to be herded off to a special part of the airport to wait in line for 30 minutes to be searched and frisked. Lucky me. So I never got to say good-bye to Drew and he had to run to catch his flight.

My flight was supposed to take off for Phoenix at 11:30, but at 11:15 when we hadn't started boarding yet, the lady at the gate counter announced that we couldn't take off because our plane was fresh off the Airbus assembly line and didn't have the manufacturer's sticker on it to be FAA-approved for the flight. We eventually got special permission from the FAA to board at 11:45. Then we had to wait another half hour to get special clearance from the tower to leave the gate. Wow. I've never had so much trouble flying. There were a lot of angry people.

I landed in Phoenix at about 1:15 p.m. Pacific and Drew, Annie, her husband Kendall, and the reporter and photographer from the Yuma Sun met me outside the terminal. When we went down to get my bags, they never came. !!!! So when I went to investigate, it turned out that since I had checked in so early in Atlanta, my bags BEAT ME to Phoenix by getting on the 8 a.m. flight. I couldn't believe it, but I was happy to see that they made it safe and sound.

While waiting for my parents to arrive, I got phone calls from my brother Michael, and my friends Claudia, Kristen and Leah. It was so good to hear from them. :)

So now I'm sending this report from the Mayo Clinic Transplant House, which is at a fabulous ranch in Scottsdale that was donated to the Mayo Clinic a few years ago. There are only seven rooms and it's specifically for Mayo patients. Just a few minutes ago, I met a man named Dennis from Oklahoma (he was watching the A&E channel in the living room where this computer is) who donated part of his liver to his wife a year ago. They were here for a few days for their yearly checkup. He told me not to worry: That once I got there, they'll get me all fixed up with the drugs, and before I know it I'll be waking up after the surgery. There was a couple from Puerto Rico that came in a few hours ago when we checked in. When they arrived, they had a flat tire, so Kendall, my dad and Drew put on the donut. The atmosphere here is just so friendly. I love it.

Plus, it's so beautiful here. :) I can't wait to take pictures.

Well, I think I'm going to sign off. I'm not sure when I'll write next. I might have my boyfriend Drew post a message for me or something of the sort. I'll be sure to keep y'all updated. :)

Until then, wish me luck. :)

I'm off!

Well, it's that time that I must go. I don't have much time because I'm packing and getting everything ready for our departure. I'm still not nervous, which is absolutely crazy, but I'm sure it'll hit me eventually. My friends Amy and Jill were wonderful and brought me over a ton of stuff to keep me preoccupied during these next couple weeks. All I can say is that they're awesome people and I'm so lucky to count them as friends.

Well, the plan is that I will have Internet access at the Transplant House, which is where I'll be staying. I can't wait to fill you all in on how it goes! :) Hasta luego!

looking inward

Today I put on a necklace that once belonged to Annie and I's grandmother. I also added a cross that a friend of mine from Brazil gave me. I plan on wearing it until I am fully recovered. During the last few weeks I've been thinking about her, my Grandma Jeanne, and what she would think about what I'm doing. She died so long ago from a heart attack; I was in sixth grade. I know that she would be proud of me and would want to be there in Arizona for both of her granddaughters, making sure that we were both OK.

I have another necklace that I have of Grandma Jeanne's. I plan on giving it to Annie when I see her Tuesday.

only a few more days

I really have no idea what I'm doing when it comes to this living will stuff. I really don't have anything important. I'm renting a house, I'm still paying on my car and I'm saddled with huge student debt ... which actually increased by $20 this month! :( I suppose the form detailing my last directives that the Mayo Clinic gave me will do. But should I still type up what I have and bring it with me? I don't know. I'm going to have a discussion with my dad tomorrow about what I should do. Drew's mom has also been really helpful and she might help me if I need any by Monday.

Anyway, in other news, Annie said that her potassium is still very high. Too high, actually. Mayo wants to put her on a certain medication, but she couldn't get it filled at the Mayo Clinic's pharmacy because they don't take her insurance -- and no other pharmacy in Phoenix actually carries the medicine. Soooo... they're still working on it. But because her potassium levels are so high, she might have to go on dialysis right before the surgery.

I hope she gets the medicine ASAP because I really don't want to see her on dialysis. From what I've heard, it takes a terrible toll on the body and could make rejection more likely after the surgery. I'll be keeping my fingers crossed.

starting to say good-bye

Today at work I started to say good-bye to people. My last day at work is Sunday but there are a few copy editors who have the privilege of having the weekend off. :) Anyway, I hate saying good-bye because it just makes me shaky.

One of my co-workers gave me two "drawings" her 2-year-old twins did for me today. It was very, very sweet. Thank you, Mary Francis! :)

People are starting to be more emotional about all of this. As you can see, my mom recently left a reply to one of my recent blog entries. I understand where she is coming from. Annie's husband is starting to really get nervous and is kind of withdrawing from people. My heart really goes out to him because I know that he is worried that something may happen to the love of his life.

I also did my pre-op interview today with the Mayo Clinic over the phone. It was pretty painless. She said that I would probably wake up with a loose oxygen mask around my face and they would ask me on a scale of 1-10 (with 10 being the worst) of how I feel. They said I might have a sore throat because of the breathing tube I'll have inserted into me during the surgery.

Tonight before I got to bed I hope to type out my will and fill out my last directives form (I keep putting it off) so I can have my friend sign it tomorrow. I need to be incredibly organized during these next few days. I hope I don't forget anything!

rumors

OK, my grandma just e-mailed me and she says there's a rumor circulating small Pocahontas, Iowa, that I'm donating my kidney to her.

haha

For the record, this is not true. And no, she doesn't need a kidney. My grandma is in fine shape. :)

So people were asking me today if I'm nervous about next week. Surprisingly, no, I'm not. At least right now. Annie told me that if I start to have trouble sleeping, Mayo will give me a one-time-only prescription for a sleeping pill. That's very nice, but so far I'm sleeping pretty good!

The donations keep coming, which is absolutely fantastic! Again, thank you to everyone who have taken time to donate to our cause. You all are blessings, and we won't forget you. :)

confirmation

I just got an e-mail from my transplant coordinator. The crossmatch came back negative, which means a week from today I'll be under the knife.

It is such a relief to know my fate! :)

it's a go

As of right now, Annie and I are treating this situation as a go; that the surgery next week is going to happen. Tomorrow, it'll be one week when I'll go under the knife. The jitters haven't hit me yet but keep reading ... I'm sure to freak out eventually. :)

I did hear exciting and fun news today. Annie got a call from the Mayo Clinic and the representative told her that she and I, and our caregivers, have been selected to receive a makeover by a local Phoenix TV station the Saturday after our surgery. How funny is that???!! :) So we might be on TV. Plus we're going to be featured in the Mayo Clinic's in-house newspaper. The representative told Annie we were picked because we've done a lot to bring attention to organ donation. (Full disclosure: Annie and I are also going to be featured in a Labor Day weekend series of articles in Annie's hometown paper, the Yuma Star, which will be written by my former Iowa State University colleague, Michelle Volkmann. Michelle and a photographer will also be at Mayo for our surgeries.)

This whole procedure will be a media extravaganza. But you know what? The more attention it gets, the more people will know about this life-giving gift.

no news is good news

Annie called me today and said she talked to her transplant coordinator about the crossmatch. The coordinator said she hadn't heard anything either, but to be heartened because no news is good news.

This makes me feel infinately better. I'm keeping the faith! :)

mother knows best

So of all people who were totally freaked out about me doing this, my mom tells me today that she is absolutely positive this is going to happen and that I have nothing to worry about.

Moms: gotta love 'em.

I was just so surprised when she said that. And because she's my mom, she has to know what she's talking about, right? :) haha Well, maybe not all of the time.